Karaoke, Stars and Stripes

What are you proud of? Are you proud of yourself for painting that picture or downing that drink, or are you proud of your child for graduating high-school or of your wife for getting that promotion? Are you proud enough of how long you've been friends with someone on Facebook that you share it for everyone else to see? (what's with that new trend, anyway?) To Simba, pride is a family. To us, let's face it, pride is a weird emotion. It can be directed towards yourself or related to someone or something you're associated with. While it can be self-fulfilling and encouraging for others, it can also be blind, sensitive and destructive. Living abroad gives me the chance to experience all of these.

Yes, my prize was a box of candy.
 No, they didn't last the night.

Often, feeling pride can be great. For example, I'm proud that Devon and I ran in the school's 5k race last Friday. I'm proud of Devon for deciding to run it at literally the last second, and I'm proud of myself for getting second place (let's forget that that means 2nd place in my heat, which was just teachers, and I lost to the only athletic trainer that ran). Nonetheless, pride. I was also proud of our students. We ran for fun, they ran for a grade in Phy Ed. And some of them kicked absolute ass. For example, our best basketball player ran it in under 18 minutes, which is pretty darn good considering running isn't as much of a priority here as it seems to be in the states. What probably helped is that we have to bike to our basketball games, and since we are always short on bikes, he simply runs alongside us to our games. So, he essentially runs a 5k before every game.

Athletics isn't the only realm where I've experienced pride. I'm proud of myself if I successfully manage a classroom for the day (or even 5 minutes, really). I feel pride when someone tells me thank you, or if I make a joke effectively enough in Spanish that my kids laugh. But I'm also proud when a student finally understands what we're teaching, or when someone who didn't seem to get it at the beginning gets a great grade on a test.

But pride can also put you in tricky situations. I'm proud of where I'm from, but even if you think you're just patriotic, if you travel the world with stars and stripes in your eyes and proclaim how the United States is the best country in the world, your pride is probably a little blind. For most of the people we've met in Bogota, we are likely part of a very small group of people they know from the states. Because their pool of representatives is limited to we few and what the media displays, they're likely to make generalizations about what we're like. In other words, many people think Americans eat a lot of fast food, we want Mexicans out of our country, and that we love war. And while all of those, indeed, are true for many from the states, it can sting a little to be shoved into that stereotype. More often than not, it's easy to get offended and separate yourself from those Americans. However, there's nothing like an outsiders perspective to make you really see how messed up your own country is. For specific examples regarding the red, white, and blue, do a quick Google search of racial or gender inequality, mass shootings, rape culture, questionable justice system etc; all things that the majority of the population tends to sweep under the rug if they haven't experienced it. Not trying to burn the flag here, but Uncle Sam should realize that there's a few fingers pointing back at him. And rather than get defensive when my patria is criticized, I'd like to think I've learned to lay in the bed we've made, which is hard to do because I never actually make my bed.

Personal pride is pretty much stripped naked and exposed when you're living abroad and communicating in a language not your own. Every time I open my mouth, I know others' ears will prick at the sound of a foreigner attempting Spanish. I know this because I come from a small town where we are caught staring at anyone with an accent different from our own. Also, if you didn't know, I can't even roll my r's, a staple of Spanish-speaking. One way you can deal with ensuing laughter emitting from the locals is to take offense and have them say a tongue twister in English, that usually shuts 'em up. But instead, I'll usually just laugh then and undoubtedly just cry myself to sleep later. In all seriousness though, learning to laugh at myself was one of the greatest things to happen to me, probably stemming from all the times I screwed up my trumpet solos in band or falling on crutches (both occurred with unfortunately high frequency). So for now, I'll continue to ask for clarification on what someone said, even if it makes me look stupid.

Overall, I think pride requires study from a distance, and being able to analyze your pride might be more important than having it. On the surface, pride feels good and builds confidence. In the big picture, I'd think it's better to make the things you're proud of such a habit that pride is replaced with character. I'm proud of who I am and who I'm becoming, but that doesn't mean there aren't occasions when I can be an insensitive ass. But for me, pride is less about short-lived satisfaction and more about a desire to improve and see others do so as well.

*Steps off soap box*

Sometimes, though, pride can be like a bandaid you just gotta rip off. On Saturday, to commemorate the recent birthdays of the oldest and youngest member of our monastery (Prior Phillip and Yeiner, respectively), we went guns blazin' with a piñata and karaoke! Since yours truly missed the last karaoke session due to hanging out with an old friend, the gringos sang multiple duets to compensate. We sang such classics as Girls Just Wanna Have Fun, Barbie Girl, and Don't Go Breaking My Heart. Also, rest assured that if there were ever gender differences in the songs, my long hair and freaky falsetto gave me the female lead, naturally (pride?). My personal favorite, though, was nabbing a nearby rug and singing/acting Aladdin and Jasmine's A Whole New World while sitting on our "flying" carpet. There are videos and photos out there somewhere of all of these that will hopefully never see the light of day.

Point is, some pride is good, while too much can be bad.

Deuces,

JJ

Spanish word of the day: Orgullo - Pride. Proud is orgulloso. There's really not much to add here.  El orgullo no es el problema, sino que ser demasiado orgulloso.

Song in my head lately: Lost and Found by Johnny Flynn. I ran into Flynn watching a movie he starred in, and decided to check him out. I like him because he mixes a bunch of different genres and knows how to play a zillion instruments. He has quite a few good songs, but this might be might my favorite.

Rainbow o're Benedict and the monastery.